Sunday, July 5, 2015

Venus conjunct Jupiter

Summer of Love

"We attract to us what we are. What does this say about us."

The power that resonated through his veins, spoke to me. I felt the call of nature as it pounded through my
veins, his presence drawing nearer, every step he took toward this culmination point a force that vibrated
the memory of another time, another place, another life, another race.
I knew him, who and what he was, or had been, before I ever saw his face. I stood still in the back of the
place, as the walls pounded around me, I he got closer and closer to where I stood. He too,
had that expectant look upon his face as he looked into my eyes, we were mesmerized. 
The whole world around us disappeared  in the moment. Life times of memories converged, flooding
in between us. We were in unity as the world stood still, we did not speak with words. Could we have
understood or heard, each other if we had? Our directions changed in the moment of that connection, two
equals connecting and passing in the night, we acknowledged each other, yet physically we never merged,
instead silently slipping away into the darkness, ever sensed, never heard.
What would have happened if we could have touched each other, followed our instinctual nature, on
that attraction, what clinical people call a whim, to me it is destiny, and to him?
We will never know, the joy, the pain, the happiness, that we lost or gained, in that significant moment that
we made that choice, never even giving a voice to the magnetic attraction that boiled just below the
surface of the skin we were in, but logic did win that day, cautioned control, our base of operations so
perfectly orchestrated by a power beyond the mundane world's domain, was cancelled out.
I have no claim to the how or why's, of the reasoning or the lies, that we formulated on our very own
personal levels, all I know is that in the passing, our meeting of the souls, both destroyed and created
our lives in the now. This is destiny, and she smiles.
Sometimes we are not ready to embrace the dream, both fear and passion, are the energy, of the same
kind of theme.It is all in the expectations, what either will be, or even mean.
The physical is a confusing thing. Why do we fight the way that we feel? Why do we try to make some
sort of sense out of emotions? They are not logical, they are hormonal, interior mechanisms, beyond our
control, biological. We have been told that it is not right to trust these transmitters and receivers, because
they lie to us. Really? What should we trust then? Research, comparisons, inflection, spreadsheets, the
group mind?
We wonder why we are so unfulfilled. When is the last time that we did anything spontaneous just because
it was what the senses willed? We want to own, control, manipulate, impress, dominate. What is wrong 
with this scenario? Where is the love? What happened to trust? Why can't we just reach out and touch?
A hug says so much, more than words can ever express. Hold my hand, look into my eyes, pat my knee,
bring me a surprise, know me. Not what you think, or see, but how we feel together, physically. If you
want to know love, you must be open to believe, "I believe in miracles. Where you from? You sexy thing?"
Remember that song? How did we get so lost, so wound up in what we think? 
They have retreats now where it is therapy for a couple to go to a place in nature with a cabin where they
won't be disturbed, they take blind folds with them. At first they practice not talking, instead they feel.
Sitting with each other holding hands, running their finger tips over the texture of the skin, the hair, one
finger tip at a time tracing and memorizing, feeding each other energy. It is all sensory projection, and
it is intense. We have lost touch with what is really important to us. "Darkness defines the light, as the light
deepens the dark, one does not exist without the other, depth and substance, no longer a void unfulfilled, but
instead passionate movement, graceful yield." Whose permission do you need to be happy?

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