"If your dreams don't scare you you're not dreaming big enough.”

You were attracting (magnetizing) conditions to you which compelled you to think that you had to make sacrifices for the good of the whole, luckily those energies are passing now. Now you have fully adjusted and are committing yourself (at last) to the break down, tear down, re-evaluate, and rebuild phase, the better part of the year has been spent doing this, now you come to the ultimatum’s (in your own mind for they are not yet ready to be totally unveiled) the base structural type of analysis.

“The truth will set you free, but first it’s going to piss you off.”

Strong individualistic tendencies indicate that you must and have established yourself as a leader in as many ways as possible. It is after all “in the blood” and you have done it “your own way” producing things that are original and unique in their presentation and utilization, or practice.

You must have something of a creative nature to do, as a distraction, or outlet, that engages the senses, or you will be wound up like a spinning top, all the time. Think of athletes, mediators, or even rock stars, who are in high profile positions. The ones who stay on top have outside interests, and hobbies, that take them out of their heads, allowing them to find a lovely balance within the world without giving anything up that is of value.

Too much pressure and you can blow, and not in a positive way. Without a focused directive, unused steam must go somewhere, sometimes it is projected onto others. This can be confusing and distracting for you, as there seems to be no motive or justification for these transmitting “mirrors” of you and their seemingly peculiar actions. You can spend a lot of valuable time trying to figure it out. Stop. Go inside. They are portraying the parts of the equation that you are in total denial of. What are they trying to show you?

You tune into new ideas that are ahead of their time. Opinions that are just stirring at the surface starting to filter through the collective, are already understood and practiced by you.

“The mind is free of illusions and you take on any kind of structure by choice only.”

You have strange sleep habits sometimes you wake up in the middle of the night, wide awake, with a ton of electricity running through your mind, something whispering, “Breaker, Breaker, one nine, hurry, hurry, hurry, you’re going to be late! Always be authentic!” Quite like the Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland. “You don’t have much time!” This can be counteracted by some sort of “same” electrical energy, like dancing. singing along with music, “music soothes the savage soul” and all of that. You must always have a good stereo system wherever you roam. Music is your medicine.

Along with all of that some sort of exercise that relaxes the body is therapeutic. Take this little test. Holding your arm out stretched out in front of your body, form a fist as tight as you can make it. Tight, tight, tight, the gritting your teeth kind of effort is what I am looking for. Feel that? Now release. Now, think about this, if you held that position for any length of time, do you think that you would do some damage to your body? Relax. Breath. Do this several times, deeply and completely. Feel that? What is the difference?

An explosive temper is the impulsive action to a passionate feeling that has been blocked by the mind, and must find an affirmative action. It is called madness. This is it’s demi god or goddess.

If it is not expressed in some affirmative way it turns on itself as some sort of illness physically manifested, or as depression. Depression is anger turned inside and wild.

Rather than try to control an unstoppable force that is headed for an immovable object (or two, or a hundred) you must give yourself permission to be different, rather than always trying to adjust to the whim, or demands of others. You must follow your own personal path. (If you have not already realized this, it is why you are here) Yes, even if it is disruptive. Let’s face it, if you don’t follow your own bliss, it will burst forth at seemingly the most inopportune moments. It always has, and it always will.

“You are just different.”

There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, or you. Let others adjust to you or not as the case may be, it will also be a whole lot more convincing, and effective. You were meant to be a bit shocking, or a lot, and disruptive now and again. This is a much more honest approach and less painful for all concerned in the long run.

“Just be who you are, with no explanation or apology.”

You will then be amazed at how your life will change, after all “like attracts like” and all that jazz. If you feel that you don’t really “know” the people around you, this is the reason for it. It is because you don’t. They are, however, your creations. Stop feeding them and they will go away. Think about that little skit called 3-fiddy, about the Lochenest Monster.

One sure fire way of knowing that you are trying to control your senses (and the circumstances around you) is when you find yourself to be accident prone, and frustrated at the slightest inconveniences. When something “IS” over everything is the pits. Those little ideo-syncrazies that used to be “so” cute, are now infuriatingly, unacceptable behavior.

When you walk in a room your magnetism sparks, expands, and enlivens other people. They are attracted by your enthusiasm. This situation is to be expected in the beginning, and it is a great way to start a project, or class, as long as, you are all growing together toward a common objective. There must be a focus. A game plan. A growth oriented experience, where you are the original inspiration, but as the projects and unfolds they must get their own, or be on their own. You cannot, nor were you meant to carry their weight forever. That is their job.

“Be sure you are right, and then go ahead”

You are not quick to form an important opinion, usually (there are exceptions) but usually you think things through thoroughly. Once you have chosen a directive that you feel is the right course of action it is nearly impossible to make you change your mind.

One of the most positive things about this is that over a period of time you impress people with your convictions, and your ability to remain true to yourself, and your decisions.

You have an awareness of the subtle intricacies and under currents in any given situation, these are details that average people miss. You know this. It amazes you.

“TUNING ROD”

You are tuned into the problems of others, the concern is always there, whether you can take, or encourage action, or repress it, or not.

If you allow yourself to get carried away with it, you can get wrapped up, or around, in some pretty serious, (and some) illogical schemes to help others, perhaps doing more harm than good, your intention initially, being to solve the problem. It can get lost in the turmoil, confusion, and ultimate pain of the individual involved. Also, sometimes you “see” their potential and not who they truly are.

There is something “otherworldly” about you, and yet the projection results in a “pied piper” kind of theme, that makes others “want to” follow you to this other world.

Sensitivity to suffering, vivid imagination. Need to shield and protect yourself in order not to become overwhelmed by what you feel. Once you learn how to do this for yourself you are enabled to experience it as a real spiritual leader, teacher, healer, guide. You are the dream and the dreamer.

How you “see” and experience the universe as you have structured it. Yours is being examined and you are being tested at this time.

You personally need to pay attention to your physical body and its base needs. It is not fate that put you where you are but your own choices and actions.

You got what you wanted, didn’t you? What did you do with it once you got it? Manifested dreams.

Whatever the losses seem to be, whatever is not working needs to be let go of, especially in the relationship area, whether physically, mentally, spiritually, intuitively, or emotionally. Perhaps all of these.

If you are in a good position it will firm up, the structure secure itself. If not, be prepared to change.

“What you resist, persists.”

Don’t allow it to become exhausting. Depression, as stated before, is anger turned inside against yourself, instead of rationalized, mourned, and consciously dealt with in good form. I think that wallowing in it is a good way of putting it. When you make the adjustments, the emotional, mental, and physical losses will shore up.

“What does not destroy you make you stronger.”

This is a new beginning. Celebrate it. Last year you did a personal “Spring Cleaning” on many levels (people included) that were no longer working for you. Congratulations! You completely launched some long held dreams, opened up to breathe, so to speak, bringing in the possibilities, and the opportunities.

Your responsibilities are heavy, but as you know the end results justify the means, and you have a lot of accomplishments just at the harvesting stage. Carry on. The outcome will be huge. It is a tough time but you must stick it out, even though sometimes you feel that it is too much to ask. It is important that you finish the things that you have started before you start anything new, long term, projects. Your creations need your full attention to launch them or finish them properly and successfully. No one else can do this without you.

The concentration should be internally. What is it that you want or need? What things have you learned about yourself over the last fourteen year period of interaction with others within the social world? You must fine tune and transform, integrate and destroy (where needs be done) keeping the best of you firmly.

The better you can chisel this into perfection, the more successful you will be. Smooth and sleek like a Panther, accomplished, distinguished, and proud.

If you feel exhausted, as if you do not have enough energy to cope. Slow down! Take a break. Cut your commitments. Turn off your phone. Your greatest investment is in yourself. without you there is no world. No success. No dream, and no projects.

“The is no S_ccess without “U” in it. Right?”

Withdraw, reschedule, redirect, delegate, refocus, realign, limit your physical time. Remember that you are the Creator of the team. Your time is precious. Put the time that you need for yourself in your datebook as a standard, not to be rescheduled for any reason other than a real emergency (think 911) appointment.

Mother Nature will force you to keep this appointment with you one way or another. It would be easier on you if you cooperated with her by making your own time with yourself a very real priority. It is that important.

You need to unlearn all of the incorrect and inaccurate ways of being, and thinking about yourself from others. It is time for a massive “head enema” type of thing, get rid of the residual chatter and find the “REAL” you. Then you can consciously restructure your life accordingly.

Exciting times, confusing times, major growth periods, you are rediscovering the power of your mind.

The problem of course “IS” other people. Isn’t it always the case? They seem to deliberately misunderstand and confuse, the simpliest things, don’t they?

If this seems intentional, that’s because it is, but perhaps, not for the reasons you think.

“People love their rituals, they make them feel safe.”

This is an illusion as you know, ever notice that? Think about it; The majority of the world right now is angry and confused because they are afraid of the truth, and they always have been. It is so much easier to dress it up in a lie and swear to it than it is to put forth the time, effort and energy that it takes to change. That would mean that they had to take responsibility for their own actions and decisions.

Be very careful how you communicate with these seemingly confused and befuddled “Nay” Sayers. Even though they seem to be “Cotton wrapped” they are dangerous contenders who will bite you eventually, if you engage. Especially if you feel sorry for them. They are the ones with the “little knife in the back” or the ones who always swear the loudest and the longest; “It’s not my fault” while the murder weapon bleeds down the front of their clean white shirts.

Ouick, look closely, see that little glint in the eye, that quick quirk at the tip of the lip? Dangerous! They are fully aware of what they want to know, see, do, or be, and they will use any manipulation to get it and to keep it. Got it?

Pay attention to what you say and do, any kind of negotiation is to be kept in neat form. Misrepresentation could get you involved in things you wouldn’t want anything to do with, and could cause losses on many levels.

When you are confused, or feeling as if you are about to over-react, take a moment to step back (behind a closed door) if possible, detach, allow your momentum and your mind to settle down, concentrate on your feet being firmly planted on the ground, breath. When you are clear, you will “see” a new view, and know it as truth. Without “knowing” at a gut level, that you are right, what is the purpose in making a solid transformational decision? You cannot afford to second guess you.

You immediately understand ideas that are foreign to the so called “rational” mind, this is where the sixth sense of psychic abilities kicks in. If you are not prepared to receive these message’s you can and will be confused. Try acting upon them instead. It is pointless to try and explain how you know what you know. Just smile that knowing little smile, and look wise. They will just think that you have insider information, which of course you do, but why bother, it is better sometimes not to “open mouth and insert foot.”

These last six or seven years have resulted in massive changes in your personal life as well as the world around you. Your very real base of operations has been fragile; dealing with intimate family matters, members, parents, moving, relocation, and death, just to name a few.

You are now released, free to be, and you may be asking yourself; What’s next for me. Nothing is as it was, everything is open for change, as new beginnings aspire to be acknowledged, there are deep changes in the unconscious mind, an opening of the ways, uncovering of the roots for inspection. Where will you plant them, if at all?

Can you allow it to just “simmer” from time to time? A balancing of the energies is needed. As in “All work and no play makes Jill a dull girl.” Make time to play just as much as you work.

You know exactly what you are capable of. Feel the buzz? Travel, increase in your dealings with foreign persons. You are learning lessons about how to go beyond self-inflicted limitations in order to manifest your own true will, your own reality in all areas of culture.

*This is the add in that I was telling you I would insert. It is transformational or destructive. Pluto is a force that compels us to die as a child and be reborn as an adolescent, to die as an adolescent to emerge as an adult…the death of one phase gives over to the birth of a new one, whether we want it to or not. There is no way to stop this from happening short of killing yourself.

Mars may keenly want a particular job, relationship, or situation, but Pluto may have something else in mind for you. Pluto might say; “I think not getting that (whatever-fill in the blank) offers more of what “you” need, and is more in line with making you develop certain traits, strengths, attributes, supporters, which you would not develop or make if you readily landed the other situation that you think you want right now.

Mars complains, gets angry, bangs things about, shoots the garbage can, and cries out; “I’ve done everything I was “supposed” to do! I’m still not getting what I want!

Your ego self can choose something that it wants, but if it is not in line with the deeper Self, you just won’t get it. Or, if you do get it, you discover it is not all you thought that it would be.

With Neptune aspects to Mars it may ask you to sacrifice or give up something that has to do with Mars, so that our personal will can adjust to something higher.

Mars reacts by pushing harder, to get what it wants, tries to pull out all the stops, by being ruthless in to win out against all of the odds. Mars tries to turn its will to law.

“Have you ever tried to fight against cosmic law?” Isabel Hickey says. “You will break your neck in the process. Have you ever tried to jump out of a ten story building because you thought you could fly? Good luck with that.

Last but by no means least; A little Greek Mythology. Saturn castrated Uranus and some of the blood from the dismembered phallus dripped back onto the ground (Gaia’s womb) giving birth to the Furies. Remember them? This is the configuration that is in Fred’s chart that is holding you both back. The Furies have names which roughly translate into envious anger, retaliation, and a sense of neverendingness.

So something is inhibited or suppressed, something need to be changed, we hold back, then the energy backs up that would have been expressed and it festers creating frustration as we become angry and depressed and envious of the people who are doing what they want to do.

So, Saturn throws the dismembered phallus into the Sea. Merging with the foam, it gives birth to Aphrodite Botticelli’s painting of Venus rising out of the Sea. What does this mean? Other than the Goddess who has invisible balls, and a steel will, beneath that soft feminine form.

We need to try and be diplomatic about change. Diplomacy makes room within the old structure for new things to happen.

Keep the best of the old, but make space for whatever new needs to come in. “Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater.”

Of course this is easier said than done. Aphrodite is also the Goddess who re-dresses imbalances. there are times when conflict and disruption are needed in order to restore a greater balance and harmony.

Also, we may have to challenge and disrupt the existing structure in the name of making our lives more harmonious. A good fight might clear the air, or be more in tune with what we are meant to be doing, especially if we are settling to try and keep the peace.

Never allow yourself to be a prisoner to any type of structure, nor a victim of past conditioning. You are here to make your own way in your own time.

I love you. Blessed Be.